It was a timely reminder – always check Rotten Tomatoes first.
This film promises but doesn’t deliver. By the end you realise you’ve been had. Two hours of your life wasted.
In case you haven’t seen this film, don’t bother. The visual appeal doesn’t make up for the mind aching stupidity which reaches a crescendo in the closing scenes.
The Book of Eli is a silly film in the post-apocalyptic genre. A film that could only have been produced by minds immersed in a culture where guns and bibles live in happy juxtaposition and GWB was elected to a second term in office.
Having watching this film I went to Google and began typing in ‘Book of Eli stupid’ before I’d finished Google had already suggested the same search in the drop down options.
I won’t go into great detail. Outlines of silliness and spoilers follow.
Denzel Washington (Why did you do it Denzel? Why?) plays a mystical prophet like figure on a 30 year god-given mission to deliver the only remaining Bible in the universe – a New King James Version… out ‘West’.
Denzel (Eli) reads his NKJV each day, has a knack – a special gift – for killing anyone who stands in the way of his mission with great efficiency, evading death against the odds. Very great odds as we will discover.
Then Gary Oldman (the bad guy) gets the NKJV. No problem, turns out it’s in Braille so he can’t read it. Denzel has memorised it and when he gets to the West place, dictates the entire Bible to Roddey McDowel who has a printing press (So eventually any bad guy will be able to get his hands on it).
Then Eli dies from a gunshot wound he got from Gary (a long walk, boat trip and dictated Bible ago) and is buried.
The New King James Version is a particularly poor translation of the Bible based on out-dated texts, slavishly following the outdated language of the original King James Version at the expense of accuracy and relevance.
God chose poorly when he delegated the task of post-apocalyptic Bible preservation. And what about the Greek texts? Were they all destroyed? What about digital copies?
The Braille version of the Bible comprises about 17 volumes. Denzel’s was the size of a normal Bible. It must have been the ‘Tardis’ edition.
Best part is finding out that Eli – the Book – was actually blind all along. Despite clearly ‘looking’ at all sorts of stuff throughout the film, not to mention shootin’ people with greater accuracy than most sighted folk is able.
In retrospect, it becomes clear that cryptic details have been carefully placed to justify this ludicrous and pointless aspect of the story.
Can’t wait for the sequel.
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_King_James_Version#Underlying_texts [↩]